Flying Monkeys

Take that! You flying monkeys.

Russell came home to me after school today asking if he could watch a movie. We allow him a fun activity after he eats his lunch IF he has had good behavior at school, which is reported to us daily by a note from his teacher. Today was a good day. He has his usual list of movies that will keep him busy in his room for a couple of hours, but after running through it, nothing was satisfactory.  I made the suggestion of watching something different. I asked if he would be interested in watching The Wizard of Oz. He didn’t have a clue of what I was talking about, so I showed him the DVD box (because to a 5 yr old, thats how you know if the movie is going to be good, if the box looks cool), and after a few “hmmms” and “huhs” he agreed.

I popped the movie in, handed him a snack and set out to do my daily things I do while he is occupied. (all times are guesstimated). Within 10 min…

Russell: Mom. That lady on the bike, She is mean, huh.

Me: Yes, she is.

Russell: The little dog bit her. But she was just mean about it.

Me: Yes. Go watch it, you’re missing it.

I set back to organizing my taxes. Within 15 more min..

Russell: Mom. Do we have those things like in the movie?

Me: What things?

Russell: The thing that blows stuff around and picks up houses. Do we have those? Will our house blow away?

Me: Oh, a tornado. No, Russell, we don’t get those here. Only in the midwest. We get things calles Tsunamis.

Russell: Tsu-whats?

Me: Go watch the movie. Mommy is busy. You’re missing it all.

Back to trying to match up statements to P&L reports. Within the next 1/2 hour…

Russell: Mom, the wicked witch is scary. I don’t like this part.

Me: Oh…well, wait a min and it will be over. It’s just a movie.

Russell: Mom, do we have lollypop kids in our town?

Me: No Russell, not here and we don’t call them that anymore. It’s not PC. They are referred to as Little People.

Russell: How about that yellow brick road? I’ve never seen on of those. And the Tin Man? How does he talk? And the Scarecrow, he can’t talk either and Lions are only in the zoo and…

Me: Russell…it’s a movie. It’s not real. Go watch.

I am seriously rethinking the idea of allowing him to watch this movie without a syllabus. Within the following moments…

Russell: I hate those flying monkeys.

Me: Me too Russell. Me too.

Russell: That wizard. Dorothy (pronounced Dorfy) says he was just a mean man but he was just a good man just a bad wizard he says.

Me: ???

Russell: They killed that witch. Little kids aren’t supposed to see stuff like that. And they did it with water. Is water bad?

Me: No Russell, water isn’t bad, the witch was bad so the water made her melt. You still have to take a bath. And, I’ve seen your video games, that was nothing.

Russell: So…can I watch it again?

Me: Maybe when you’re 30.

Still, my taxes are not done. 🙂